I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!
by That Unknown Fangirl
Summary: Chad's a geek? Tawni's his friend? Sonny's a popular cheerleader? No way! But it's all possible, because you see, the world can go to any extent to teach Chad Dylan Cooper a lesson.
1. Angry Celebrity

**Well, this idea got two votes and I'd already started writing it, so here we go. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! <strong>

**Chapter 1 – Angry Celebrity**

Chad Dylan Cooper storms down the hallway of Condor Studios, angrier than ever. He exits the large building, and sits in his expensive convertible, leaving the top closed and slamming the door loudly in a fit of rage.

The greatest actor of his generation shouldn't be treated like this. He deserves better than dumb co-stars who keep messing up their lines, useless, good for nothing assistants, lumpy loganberry smoothies, an overly perky girlfriend, and the annoyingly stalkerish paparazzi. Today he'd yelled at pretty much everyone that ticked him off, even just slightly.

He drives, heading straight to his palace-like mansion, and completely ignoring the speed limit. Hollywood's bad boy can do what he wants, and nobody can stop him. He narrowly avoids an accident, but collides with another car in the process. His damage-proof car remains unharmed, while the other car is smashed badly. An angry girl steps out, starting to yell at him. Chad simply rolls down the window, flips her off, and drives home.

Chad Dylan Cooper does _not_ apologise. Especially not to random people in the street.

He arrives home, and slams the car door shut, doing the same to the main door of the massive mansion. He runs up to his room, locking himself inside. Life is unfair.

He sighs, kicking off his sneakers and throwing his leather jacket across the room, as he collapses onto the giant, soft bed.

Everyone is so annoying these days! With that thought in his head, he falls into a peaceful sleep.

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><p><strong>Angry Chad = Sexy Chad ;) I just had to say it xD<strong>

**So, review? :)**


	2. Where Am I?

**Nice to see people are reading and liking this story! So, I'm gonna keep going! Enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!<strong>

**Chapter 2 – Where Am I?**

**Chad's POV**

"Chad? Chad, wake up!" I hear Mom say, trying to shake me awake. Why?

I sigh softly. I needed some rest. I feel a lot better now, than I did during yesterday's anger fit. I yawn as I sit up, and look around. All I can make sense of seeing is the sunlight. Wait – why is everything so _blurry_? Am I, like, semi-blind or something?

"Here." Mom hands me something, which I think is a pair of glasses. Since when did the awesome CDC need glasses? Well, being able to see is definitely better than being half blind, so I decide to give it a go. I fumble a little with them, but finally manage to put them on, and everything comes into focus.

I look around; this place is very unfamiliar to me. It's a pretty small room, with shelves everywhere. Some are covered in small trophies, while others have books. In a corner is a wooden desk, with a slim laptop and a desk lamp on it. Next to the bed, there's a small bedside table that matches the desk, but has a nightlight on it, and also a bottle of water surrounded by flaps of various medicine tablets, and ointments. There's one small closet in the other corner, with mirrors on the doors. There's also a really small dresser, with random things scattered on it. I then look down at the bed. _No way._ A racecar bed. That makes me start to wonder. Where the hell am I? This isn't my room, and never in a million years will it be.

"Wh-where am I?" I say, running a hand through my hair. Wait, why is my hair so _long_? It was like this before, but it isn't now… **(Imagine him at the end of Season 1)**

"Home! Where did you think you are?" Mom asks. At least she's here, in this weird place. Wait – have I been kidnapped by a geeky fan or something? _Probably not._

"This isn't my room…" I say.

"Of course it is!" She leaves, and I'm confused. I stand up and look in the mirror. I look pretty much the same, except my hair is longer and I'm wearing these…_geeky glasses_. I'm wearing a random t-shirt, with baggy shorts. Okay, not so weird there. I decide to leave my annoyingly geekish reflection alone for a while, and take a look around the room instead. I head for one of the trophy shelves, and start to read a trophy at random.

'_Chad Goldfarb – Winner of 5__th__ Grade Spelling Bee.'_

When did I ever participate in a spelling bee? Heck, what _is_ a spelling bee? Why is my last name still Goldfarb on there? I shake off all the questions, and move on to the next item, which is a certificate. It's got a first place ribbon attached to it.

'_Awarded to Chad Goldfarb, for outstanding achievement in the Hollywood High Science Fair – 2008.'_

Now, there are _so_ many things wrong with this one. First, my last name had changed to Cooper, way before 2008. Second, I've never even _been_ to a real-life science fair (we had a science fair set on Mackenzie Falls a couple seasons ago, and that was it). Third, I don't bother to learn much science, so how could I possibly win something like that?

I sigh, and glance at the bookshelf below. It has all kinds of books, but they're all based on…_science_? Since when was I a science geek?

"Chad, hurry up, or you'll be late for the first day back to school!" Mom calls from downstairs.

"School? Since when does Chad Dylan Cooper have to go to school?" I ask nobody in particular.

"I don't know who Chad Dylan Cooper is, but Chad Goldfarb better get ready and get a move on!" She yells. How did she even hear that?

Suddenly, I hear a phone ring. It takes me a few seconds to realise that it's mine, so I pick it up from the bedside and hit answer. Hey, when did I get a BlackBerry?

"CDC, whadda do?" I answer the phone with my usual, awesome greeting.

"Chad, is that you?" An unfamiliar male voice asks, shocked.

"Uh, yes?" I say. Who the heck is this guy?

"Are you sure you haven't been kidnapped by aliens who are making you talk like a cool person?" He asks. I look at the caller ID and see that the caller is some dude named Jared 'JJ' Johnson. Ew, talk about a geeky nickname.

"Do I even _know_ you?" I ask. The name is as unfamiliar as the voice.

"Yeah, we're best friends! Did you hit your head or something, Chaddy-o?" He says, laughing weirdly. Oh joy; I'm best friends with a nerd. Meh, that's probably how I won the science fair. "Anyway, see you at school." He hangs up, and I throw the phone onto the bed. So, let me put all of this together. Yesterday, I was home and happy (well, kinda). And today, I woke up in this totally unfamiliar room, looking like a loser. What the freakin' hell is going on?

"Hello there." A voice says, startling me. I turn around, and it's coming from somewhere around the mirror. I can't see my reflection anymore – there's white mist everywhere.

"Who are you?" I ask. Wait, maybe I should phrase that differently. "_What _are you?"

"Do you want to know why you're here?" The soft, angelic voice asks. Heck yeah!

"Yeah." I reply.

"Then you must not ask me any more questions."

"Okay, fine. Then tell me why I'm here!" I say.

"We have sent you here to teach you a lesson. From being the spoilt, rich, actor you were, you are now a regular boy, who is in no way any better than anybody else." The voice explains happily. Okay, now I'm waiting for Zora to jump out of the closet or something, telling me I've been celebrity practical joked. I pause, but it doesn't happen. So I'm not being pranked. I pinch myself, to make sure this isn't a dream – more like, a nightmare. Ow, that hurt! And now I know this is oddly real…

"What? How am I meant to survive? Tell me how to get back home, right now." I yell. If the voice was an actual person, I would have punched the answer out of them.

"You have to get everyone here to believe you, and convince them of who you really are, within the next two months. If you succeed, you will return home when these two months are up. However, if you fail, you will have to stay in this parallel world forever." It replies. No way am I staying in this messed up place forever! I have to go back. "Now, I suggest you get ready for school, before you are late." The voice says. "Goodbye!" And as quickly as it came, all the white mist disappears.

I sigh, and open the closet. What meets my eyes is absolutely horrifying…

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><p><strong>Hehe :P<strong>

**Review! :D**


	3. High School Miserable

**Top of the world, we're at the top of the world…meh, I've been watching too much Pair Of Kings. :P Anyway, enjoy the chapter!**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!<strong>

**Chapter 3 – High School Miserable**

**Chad's POV**

_Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting._ The closet is full of geek clothes. Formal shirts, dressy pants, sweater vests, and classic geek stuff. Ew.

After five minutes of throwing things around, I manage to put together an outfit that closely resembles a Mackenzie Falls uniform. That should just have to do for now, I guess. It's the best I can do at the moment.

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><p>God save the Chad. I'm standing outside a massive building, which I'm guessing is Hollywood High. For someone that's never actually had to go to a real school (yes, I've been home-schooled my whole life), this place is pretty darn huge. Suddenly, my phone buzzes, so I take it out of my pocket and look. There's a text message.<p>

_Hey, were r u? Gt 2 lockr asap!_

It's from that Jared dude that called me earlier. _Lockr_? Probably means locker. Now, where the hell is this locker?

"Chad!" Someone calls, running towards me. It's a geeky guy, who looks about the same age as me, and strangely resembles James Conroy. Awkward.

"Woah, what the fuck?" I say, as he crashes into me, knocking me to the ground.

"Sorry!" He says. I catch a glimpse of the nametag on his backpack – this is that weirdo, Jared.

"Ugh." I stand up, brushing the dirt off my blazer. CDC's got to look good, even in another world.

"Dude, _what_ are you wearing?" Jared asks in disbelief.

"What's wrong with the Falls?" I ask. I look pretty hot, if you ask me.

"The Falls? Man, you're going crazy. Sure you didn't go off to Vegas and leave your mind there this summer?" He says.

"I haven't been to Vegas since last year." I reply. It's true – don't ask why.

"Ah, whatever. Come on." I follow him into the building, confused. This dude is really weird. We end up in one of those typical movie-esque high school hallways, with lockers lining the walls and random students standing around. Now I've been dragged to stand in front of a locker, which I guess is mine, and I have no idea what the combination is. I don't have a chance to think, though.

"CHAD!" Someone squeals, and now she's hugging me. When she steps away, I recognise her.

"Tawni?" I say, confused. What the heck is Tawni doing here, and why is she so excited to see me?

"Yep. Missed me?" She asks, giving me a flirty smile. Why is Tawni Hart trying to flirt with me?

"No." I reply simply. She frowns as I lean on the locker and get my phone out of my pocket, checking my reflection in the shiny screen. Without the fugly glasses, I'm totally sexy. Yeeeah. I make a mental note to get contacts later.

"What are you doing?" Jared asks.

"Yeah, you don't usually care about how you look!" Tawni says. Me, not caring about how I look? What's up with this world?

"Vain Random that suddenly has a crush on me, say what now?" I say. Yes, a line from Hannah Montana is the best I can do right now.

"Stop with the Hannah Montana quotes, Chad. Hey, there's Allie!" Jared says.

"Who the hell is – holy fudge, who is that?" I ask, when I see an extremely hot girl walk into the hallway, followed by an army of random others. Yeah, I said 'fudge'. Problem? Didn't think so.

"Allison Munroe." Jared replies darkly. Then I recognise her. It's Sonny, and the two guys with her are Nico and Grady. Yes, I know their names. I didn't think I would, but I do.

"Hey, Sonny!" I say. She turns to glare at me.

"Who's the nerd?" She asks, sounding oddly like her Check-It-Out-Girl character. What? I do watch So Random – sometimes.

"Sonny, I know you're angry, but I'm sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean to yell at you." I just attempted to apologise to her. She looks at me like I'm crazy, and walks away.

"Chad, what was that about?" Tawni asks.

"Can't CDC apologise to his girlfriend without being interrogated?" I ask in response.

"Who's CDC?" She asks.

"Chad Dylan Cooper." I reply. Tawni and Jared are also looking at me like I've totally lost it. "Me." I add.

"Your name is Chad Goldfarb." Jared states simply.

"Really?" I ask, confused. What kind of world is this?

"Yeah, and Allison isn't your girlfriend." Tawni says.

"What?" I ask. Sonny isn't my girlfriend?

"Dude, we know you're obsessed with her. But she hates you. She's a slut anyway." Jared says.

"Don't you dare call my Sonny a slut." I growl, going to punch him. No-one can call Sonny anything like that, especially when I'm around. Tawni grabs my arm, and stops me.

"Forget it; why are you dressed like that?" She asks.

"What problem do you have with Mackenzie?" I ask, shocked. Mackenzie is awesome, because, well, Mackenzie is me. Or rather, I am Mackenzie.

"Who's Mackenzie?" Jared asks.

"Never mind…" I sigh. I hate this stupid parallel world. Suddenly, a loud bell rings. "FIRE! RUN!" I yell, heading for the exit. I _cannot_ get burnt in a fire.

"Chad." Tawni says, catching up and stopping me. "That was the school bell. C'mon, let's get to class."

"Class?" I yell, shocked. Could this day get any worse?

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><p><strong>I know some parts of that were a lot like the High School Miserable episode – it gets crazier, though. Just…no singing or kidnapping (at least, I don't plan on that).<strong>


	4. Lookin' Good

**OMG, I can't believe so many people are adding this story to their alerts! I love you guys! :D**

**I'm gonna give zarachannylover101 a shout-out, coz you is awesome! And happy birthday! :D**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!<strong>

**Chapter 4 – Lookin' Good**

**Chad's POV**

The rest of the day went by fairly slowly, and Tawni and Jared dragged me around the school alright. They were with me for most of the – _urgh _– classes, so at least I wasn't wandering around like a lost puppy. Even if I would've been, though, someone would've helped me, because well, I'm irresistible. And then, when I was finally free from the building of mental torture, otherwise known as school, I decided it was time to CDC-fy Chad Goldfarb.

The first item on the list was contacts, because those glasses were murderously ugly. I managed to get rid of them pretty quickly, after threatening to beat up the optician dude. He'd cowered away in fear and given me the contacts for free. That's how the CDC rolls.

Next, wardrobe. I couldn't be awesome with those neeky chunks of cloth '_Chad Goldfarb_' called clothes. Usually, I have professional designers shopping for me, but in this case I really didn't have much of a choice. So I had to drag myself. Urgh, CDC, _shopping_. Never thought I'd have to see this day. Somehow, I still had my credit card, so at least I could go for something half decent. After I was done with the whole new wardrobe, from a billion different stores, I thought of what to go looking for next.

Ah, I realised I need something to get to that dump called school on. A convertible was my first thought, but then…_neh_. I want to be a little more daring than that. A motorbike seemed like something worth trying, so I walked to the vehicle showroom and threatened the guy there to give me the best motorbike in the whole store, or I'd punch him. And he got scared of me, which was weird, because I was still geek-Mackenzie at that point. Anyway, I got the motorbike, and then got a haircut, so I look more like…_me_.

And now, I'm sitting on a bench in the park, fully me-fied, and holding a cigarette. Yeah, Chad Dylan Cooper smokes. You got a problem with that? You better not. Anyway, I'm 18 – it's legal. Not that I care, of course!

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><p>I stop my motorbike right in front of the main door of the school, and everyone starts crowding around me. What, you've never seen an awesome dude on a motorbike before? But hey, the CDC-fied Chad Goldfarb attracts a lot of attention around here. I don't think they even recognise me. I mean, him. I mean, whatever!<p>

"Hey, back off, girls." I say. I'm used to a bigger crowd than this – this is absolutely _nothing_ compared to Chad Dylan Cooper's fans. But they aren't going to distract me right now. I only have one target at the moment – Sonny. And the greatest actor of our generation is going to put on an excellent performance.

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

I'm standing with my best friends, Ash and Zeya, outside the school. We're surrounded by random people, but we don't really care.

"Allie, don't you think Jake is sooo hot?" Zeya gushes, dreaming about the school's popular quarterback. I honestly don't think much of him, even though I should be dating him. He's the captain of the football team, and I'm the head cheerleader – we're kind _expected_ to date. But I think he's ugly and annoying.

"Oh my gosh! Who's that?" Ash says, as a gust of wind rushes past us. It stops, and I realise it was a guy on a motorbike. He's pretty hot, and he's just grinning weirdly at the sudden crowd that's formed around him. He's got short blond hair, and is wearing designer sunglasses, a leather jacket, torn jeans, and Converse. Hot. But he doesn't look very familiar – probably new around here. Let me show him how things work around here.

"Hey, back off, girls." He says to the crowd. What is he, like, a celebrity or something? He pushes through the massive crowd, approaching me. Smart move, newbie. "Hello there, beautiful." He says to me, taking the shades off. His eyes are blue…_really, really blue…_ I'm momentarily distracted. "Lost in my eyes already, hey?" The sound of his voice breaks me out of the weird trance. Wait, seeing his face up close, he does look somewhat familiar. I can't remember where and when I've seen him before, though.

"H-hi." I gasp. Seriously, Allie? That's all you could say? I try to regain my whole 'I rule the school' posture, and continue. "Who are you?" I ask, throwing as much attitude and confidence as I can into my tone.

"Chad Dylan Cooper." He replies, smirking. Cute. "And may I know who _you_ are?" What's with the formal tone? And Chad Dylan Cooper sounds like a fake name. He could be a spy, or a celebrity, or a stalker **(Hehe ;])**, or anyone really.

"Allison." I reply simply.

"Just Allison?"

"Allison Munroe."

"Imma call you Sonny. That okay?" Chad asks, smirking again. Who is he to talk to me like that?

"Uh…" Speak, Allie! _Speak!_

"Good." He says.

"Good." I retort.

"Fine."

"Fine!" I storm off, angry. The one time a slightly good-looking guy walking into this school, and I had to fight with him. Great. Just freaking great.

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><p><strong>Ta-daa! <strong>

**I have a question for you guys today. If you were to try to kidnap Sterling Knight, how would you do it? **

**That's all. Peace and reviews! ;)**


	5. Come With Me

**I'm going crazy, guys. 27 reviews in just 4 chapters! I love you all! And guess what? STERLING KNIGHT REPLIED ME ON TWITTER! OMC, HE FREAKING REPLIED **_**ME**_**! That means **_**he knows I exist**_**! I've been on a high about that all day!**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!<strong>

**Chapter 5 – Come With Me**

**Chad's POV**

"Fine!" Sonny yells, and storms away angrily. That good-fine thing is like some kind of ghost. Even in a whole other world, it's haunting me.

"Don't take it personally. She does that to everybody." One of the girls standing there tells me.

"Yeah? Well, I'm not everybody." I say, and smirk. Man, that was too cliché to even be _legal_. "Peace out, suckahz!" I leave with my signature peace-out hand sign, and head in the direction Sonny ran off in. I don't have time for the stupid, creepy girls that were falling all over me – in fact, I couldn't care less. I find myself standing in a vast, open space that looks somewhat like a field. Not a used one, though; the grass is overgrown and looks pretty much untouched. I suddenly spot Sonny, sitting on a small deckchair with her back to me. I creep up to her, going unnoticed…

"Boo!" I yell suddenly, scaring her. She falls off the chair, onto the soft grass. "Sorry about that. You okay?" I say, offering my hand to help her up, and she smiles, taking it. And suddenly, she pulls me down to the ground too.

"That's what ya get for messing with me." Sonny smirks, standing up and sitting on her chair again, "So, what do you want?"

"Well, the first thing…" I start to blabber total nonsense, and sit on her lap, somewhat imitating those weird little kids and the even weirder fake Santas at the mall during Christmas. They've always been pretty creepy.

"Y'know, it's highly creepy for a guy to be sitting on a girl's lap." Sonny says. I pick this moment to use one of my favourite lines.

"Is it, Sonny? Is it really?" I say, going briefly into Mackenzie-mode.

"Yes, yes it is. With which I'm implying…get off of me!" She pushes me, and I fall. Time for some more acting.

"Oww…I think I lost some brain cells…" I moan, pretending to have hit my head really badly on the ground. It's not too difficult, seeing as I'm the greatest actor of our generation.

"You had brain cells?" Sonny asks sarcastically. Wow, she is _different_ in this 'parallel world'.

"Yup." I stand up.

"Huh."

"What?"

"You aren't half bad. Although, I do _know_ who you are." Sonny says.

"Whaddya mean?" I ask. I honestly have no idea what she's going on about.

"Chad Dylan Cooper," She says, also standing up, "That sounds like the kind of name some celebrity would have."

"That's coz it is." I reply.

"And you're not him. I know you're not." She says, taking a step closer to me.

"Then who do _you_ think I am?" I ask, trying to see what she thinks.

"Isn't obvious?" She says, looking straight into my eyes. For a moment, I think she somehow…_remembers_ – if that's the right word, "I can spot those contacts a mile away. That denim – cheap. And this leather – _totally fake_." She pokes my jacket with an overly pointy nail, making a hole in it. Is that even _possible_?

"It was fine till you attacked it." I say, taking it off. CDC _cannot _be walking around in a torn jacket, even in some world where I'm a neeky-geeky-creepy.

"So, _Chad_, what did you think you'd gain from all of this?" Sonny asks, glaring at me. If looks could kill, I would probably be dead already. Hey, if I die in this world, would I still be alive in the real world? Like, parallel universe suicide or something? Wait, am I dead in the real world? Nyeh, too many questions!

"You." I smirk, and she looks even angrier. Angry Sonny – not pleasant.

"What makes you think I'll fall for a _nerd_ like you?" She asks. That hurts. Bad.

"Since when is Chad Dylan Cooper a nerd?" I ask.

"Who are you trying to trick, _Chad Goldfarb_?" Sonny sighs, "You're a _total_ nerd."

"I may be a nerd – which I'm not," I pause to take my phone out of my pocket and check my reflection in the shiny screen, "but I'm freakin' sexy, if I do say so myself." I smirk.

She mumbles something that sounds very much like 'I didn't deny it.' Then she says, "Shut up and come on. We should be getting to class."

"You actually _want_ to go?" I ask. Sonny, of all people in this weird, other world.

"No, but we don't really have much of a choice." She replies.

"I aint goin'." I say simply, flopping down into the chair. Not bad, Chaddy.

"A nerd that cuts class? That's something new. Well, I'm going whether you're coming or not. Bye!" Sonny says, and attempts to make a dramatic exit. Huh, drama was never her thing. She ends up failing, though – she trips on something (not my fault!), and falls back, landing on my lap. _Very_ dramatic, Sonny.

"And I thought you hated me." I say, and sigh fakely.

"I do hate you." She says.

"Then why, oh, why are you sitting on me?" I ask. It's a point to be noted.

"Revenge," She replies, and then mumbles, "And I fell."

"And if I, the great Chad Dylan Cooper, weren't here to break your fall, you'd have lost way more brain cells than me." I say, and smirk again. Man, I smirk too much in this world. I guess the situation seems to call for it.

"So aren't you gonna, like, carry me to class or something?" Sonny asks suddenly. I laugh like a maniac, and sigh.

"Oh, Sonny. Sonny, Sonny, Sonny. That's the _last_ place I'd want to carry you." I say. I have a plan.

"So, what are you thinking?" She asks.

"Follow me." I say, and head for the gates of the field, to leave. I know what I'm doing.

"Woah, woah, woah. I never said I trusted you enough to follow you. For all I know, you could be trying to kidnap me or something!" Sonny says. I think she's still standing by the chair.

"Believe me, kidnapping you isn't something CDC would do." I say.

"And you think that's enough to make me come with you?"

"Uh, yes?"

"Whatever. If we're going somewhere, we better go quickly, before someone catches us leaving."

"As you say, Sonshine."

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><p><strong>That was fun to write, for some reason…and I'm still going mad about how Sterling Knight replied to me! It's epic! :D<strong>


	6. An Eventful Journey

**Really sorry, guys! I know I haven't updated in, like, a month. I had some really bad writers block with this story, and had no idea how to continue! But now, it's cured. I'm back, baby! ;)**

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><p><strong>I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!<strong>

**Chapter 6 – An Eventful Journey**

**Chad's POV**

We run to the gates, trying not to get caught by any teachers along the way. Who knows where they roam around when they don't have classes to teach? Teachers don't have lives; at least, I don't think they do. Not that I know, of course!

"And just where do you think you're going?" I look up to see this creepy looking guy in a suit, glaring at us. I guess he's an overdressed teacher – ick.

"Uh…" Sonny starts, looking to me for help. What can I do, what can I do…? Hey, I have an idea!

"No hablo English-o…?" I try, worried. I'm pretty sure that's not even correct Spanish – I don't know much. Sonny giggles slightly. And the teacher dude seems to have fallen for it, though.

"Oh, está bien, yo hablo español así!" He says suddenly, smiling. Shit.

"What the heck did he just say?" I whisper to Sonny, confused. As I said, I don't know much Spanish.

"Uh…I think he said he speaks Spanish?" She says. Heh, I hope she's right.

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

I can't believe I agreed to leave class and go with Chad. Chad, the idiot. What was I thinking?

And now, we're walking across the grounds, to the car park, after the encounter with the school principal, who we managed to fool into thinking Chad is a lost exchange student from Spain. I don't know where exactly he's taking me – he's leading the way. Suddenly, he stops. We're standing next to a black motorbike, which I know to be the best one around.

"This is yours?" I ask Chad, shocked.

"Yep." He replies, grinning, "Whatcha waiting for? Come on!" As weird as all this is, I have no idea why I listened to him and sat on the motorbike. Because that's where I happen to be at this moment. And it's weird. And he smells nice. Mmm. Hot. Wait, did I really just think that? About _Chad_? _Yes, you did._ No, I didn't! _You did, girl!_ I'm losing it!

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><p>The motorbike is going crazy fast, and I want to mess with Chad a little. He doesn't seem like the kind of person that would've driven a motorbike before. So, I stand up, and throw my hands up, giggling like crazy. "Wheeeeeeee!"<p>

"Sonny! Sit down, you're gonna - agh - make this whole thing - oh, no - drop!" Chad says, scared. I laugh, and start moving even more.

"This is fun!" I giggle, acting like a little kid. It is actually pretty fun, and Chad being scared is hilarious.

"Sit down! We need - oh my pasta - we need to - agh - balance this thing out! Oh, God help us…" He says, as the motorbike starts to lose control a little. It seems like it really will fall. I give up, and sit down. But this time, I'm holding onto him so tight, he _will_ be annoyed eventually.

"Look, Sonny, you're seriously damaging the Chabs." Chad suddenly says.

"Whatever." I loosen my grip on him, and lean back. The motorbike stops, and we arrive at a deserted road, beside a huge forest. "Chad, where are we?" I ask him, suddenly a little afraid. I hope he isn't up to anything…_funny_.

"Just follow me." Chad says, taking my hand. I feel a spark, and quickly pull my hand away. I don't like this guy, however good-looking he may be. I do _not_ like him. Suddenly, I hear…a chicken clucking? "Stupid ringtone…" Chad mumbles, getting a phone out of his pocket. Huh, I never expected a nerd-turned-hot would have a BlackBerry Bold. What's happening to the world? Wait…did I just say he was hot? I didn't mean that, I thought it by accident! "What do you want? Yeah, I know I'm hot, but my name is not Chad Goldfarb. What the hell? No, I will not do that! I'm 17, for crying out loud! Exactly, you're a kid. Now stop wasting CDC's time. BYE!" He yells, and hangs up, "I'm sorry you had to hear that."

"It's okay." I say. I wonder what it was that the person on the other end of the line wanted…

He sighs. "I hate people."

* * *

><p><strong>Chad's POV<strong>

I wish I'd have bought a convertible. I'd forgotten one crucial detail - I'd never even touched a motorbike in my life. So how the heck am I meant to be in full control of one? I'm maintaining that control thing pretty well, until Sonny suddenly stands up behind me, waving her arms about and squealing, "Wheeeeeeee!"

"Sonny! Sit down, you're gonna - agh - make this whole thing - oh, no - drop!" I say, terrified. It's bad enough that I don't know how to work this thing with someone sitting behind me, and she's making it worse!

"This is fun!" Sonny says, giggling.

"Sit down! We need - oh my pasta - we need to - agh - balance this thing out! Oh, God help us…" I say, still scared. The motorbike wobbles a little, as I lose control of it for a moment. I somehow fix it, though. Sonny finally sits down. And now, she's holding onto me so tightly, she's _crushing my Chabs_. Not nice. So I'm trying to make this motorbike go as fast as it's possible; I don't deserve to be tortured by a girl! Huh, I didn't say I didn't like it, seeing as it's Sonny. But for now, it's time for some Chaditude!

"Look, Sonny, you're seriously damaging the Chabs." I say.

"Whatever." She says, leaning back. I stop the motorbike; we've arrived exactly where I wanted. "Chad, where are we?" Sonny asks, sounding scared. Ha, that's what I was waiting for!

"Just follow me." I tell her, and take her hand in mine. She suddenly pulls her hand away, angrily. And as if it was some kind of cue, my phone starts to bawk. Yes, it _bawks_. "Stupid ringtone…" I growl, and get it out of my pocket. And who's calling the CDC? Some girl named Marta. Wait - Marta, as in the evil Penelope, Marta?

"Hellooooo, Chaddy Goldfarb!" She says cheerfully.

"What do you want?" I ask, bored. If this world is anything like the real world (which it isn't, but this could be), she would still be evil. Maybe she goes to that high school too, as like, a popular someone or something like that. I don't know.

"I just wanted to tell you how hot you are, you sexy nerd." She replies seductively. Is she complimenting me or insulting me?

"Yeah, I know I'm hot, but my name is not Chad Goldfarb." I say simply.

"Soo, you wanna, y'know, _meet up_ later?" She asks. I can pretty much imagine she's winking, and what she means by 'meet up'.

"What the hell?" I yell.

"Oh, you know." She says, trying to sound sweet, but it turns out sickening.

"No, I will not do that! I'm 17, for crying out loud!" I say. Bitch.

"Well, I'm 16." She says proudly, as if that changes anything.

"Exactly, you're a kid. Now stop wasting CDC's time. BYE!" I say, and hang up quickly. Bitch. "I'm sorry you had to hear that." I say to Sonny.

"It's okay." She says. Now _that_ sounds like the real Sonny!

"I hate people." I sigh, and my phone starts bawking again, "Dammit!" I throw it on the hard pavement, and it smashes.

"Are you alright?" Sonny asks, genuinely concerned.

"That ringtone bugs me." I say simply, "Now, follow me."

* * *

><p><strong>And that was my horrible excuse for an update. Heh, review anyway! :P<strong>


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